Renewed Purpose

We felt like a ship without a heading for a couple of months.  We had the basic information.  We thought we knew what we wanted to do.  We thought we knew what God wanted us to do...sort of.  We just didn't know where to go from there with no map to guide us.  I am a detail-oriented person.  I need a specific set of instructions or a specific plan in place to accomplish a goal.  Starting or growing a family is not like that.  Fortunately, when starting or growing your family biologically once you are pregnant, backing out isn't much of an option.  Once you see the two pink lines, the plus sign, or the digital readout indicating "pregnant," you can't back off and say, "I'm not so sure about this, lets wait a while."  With adoption you have to make decisions at each stage and take purposeful steps forward in order for things to progress.  Without a positive test and a due date to determine your general course and a growing belly to show your progress, it can be a little discouraging.  Second-guessing your decision to have a baby doesn't really matter when you are pregnant, you are all in.  Second-guessing your decision to adopt a baby or merely wondering if this is really what God wants for your family can be a major roadblock, bringing your journey to a screeching halt until you get yourself back on track and take the next intentional step.
We were stuck at a roadblock for a couple of months.  Then a few weeks ago, after a lot of prayer, we decided to take the next purposeful step.  We applied to begin the Home Study process and signed up for the first required class.  We were approved to begin the Home Study process, got babysitters (we have some amazing friends) for the three kiddos, and attended the adoption class at our home study agency.  The class was an opportunity to walk through the process with a social worker, ask questions, and interact with other couples/families also hoping to adopt.  What became glaringly obvious as we went around the room to introduce ourselves and tell where we were in the process was that we needed to get our buns in gear!  We hadn't touched the home study packet (read: 2-inch thick, 3-ring binder full of paperwork to fill out, and tasks to accomplish).
So, I am happy to say that we are now well into the packet (thanks to my wonderful husband who hung out with the kids all day yesterday while I filled out forms, answered questions, stuffed envelopes, and prepared items for submission).  We still have quite a bit to do, but we are approaching the journey with renewed purpose.  We may not know exactly what the journey will look like, but we are making intentional strides in the direction of growing our family.

And the journey begins...

We have had the issue of adoption on our hearts for years.  It was just always something we were interested in.  James' brother Paul is adopted, his cousin adopted a beautiful little girl to add another smiling face to their family, we have watched many friends struggle with infertility, James' sister and her family have fostered kids...the list goes on.  Adoption just always remained something in the back of our minds.  Thanks to God, we were able to conceive with no trouble at all.  We were staggered a bit by a miscarriage in the midst of bringing home three wonderful children.  Aside from that we were blessed and content.
That is, we were content until a few months ago.  We hadn't really ever thought that much about adoption from the Biblical perspective and had only really started thinking about it from the environmental sustainability perspective.  But sometime in November/December, God gave us the kick in the pants that got us on our journey to adoption.  Within the span of a single weekend the concept of adoption came at us on just about every level in our life.  From friends talking about it, to the topic coming up in plot lines of movies or TV we were watching, to a seemingly out-of-the-blue message about it from our pastor at church that Sunday, we got the message.  We needed to look more into adoption as it related to our family.  Before we left church on Sunday James actually told a friend, "God has done everything but take out a billboard to tell us we need to investigate adoption further."  Our friend's response..."You haven't driven home yet."
One of the things mentioned that Sunday as part of the sermon was a class that some members of our church were hosting about adoption.  It was a one-day, all-day class about adoption from a Biblical perspective.  So we signed up, and a few weeks later we took part in the class and learned a lot more about adoption.  We got plugged into the adoption community at our church.  We started reading books, talking to friends and family, doing research online..anything we could to learn more. 
With all that initial momentum you would think we were off to a running start, but after the holidays we just felt stuck.  We had a lot more information, but didn't really know what to do with it.  We prayed about it a lot.  We asked others to pray with and for us.  We talked about it, then we avoided talking about it, then we started talking about it again.  We set up a meeting with a local agency that does home studies and also facilitates local adoptions.  We met with the wonderful owner of Adoption & Beyond here in Overland Park.  She was a font of information and exerted no pressure on us to sign up for anything we weren't ready for.
We solicited information from several local and national agencies, including an adoption facilitation agency (different from a traditional adoption agency).  The people I spoke to at the facilitation agency were extremely gracious and honest.  They ultimately decided that our family dynamic didn't fit with any of the birth mothers currently on their list so politely declined to take us on as clients.  More on that in another post...
After all that, we were still stuck.

Christmas 2011

What a wonderful year it has been! We have been blessed beyond measure this year and look

forward to a wonderful 2012.

We have been having an awesome time with Grandma Melanie and Uncle Lucas the last few days. The kids can't get enough of them.

Mom heard "grandma, grandma" every 5 minutes for the first two days she was here and Lucas could hardly walk into a room without being mobbed by kids who wanted to climb on him.

Ella has taken the opportunity to grow up before our eyes! She has added a word every other day to her vocabulary in the last week or so. It is amazing to watch her mimic Katherine, Jack, Grandma, Uncle Lucas, James and I. She notices so much around her that we don't even realize!

The kids have had a blast doing projects with Grandma. They decorated a gingerbread house from a kit our neighbor Amy gave us - the temptation that provided was too much so the house was relocated to get it out o sight and hopefully out of little minds!

Christmas morning was awesome. The kids had a great time opening and playing with their new presents. We haven't broken out the new Wii games yet, but with an added controller the kids and Grandma will have a blast dancing with the Nick characters and exploring with Diego.

By far, the most amazing blessing this Christmas has been having Grandma and Uncle Lucas with us. My heart swells watching them interact with the kids, enjoying the little things and the big things.

We celebrate the birth of our savior this time of year and look to Easter remembering that He makes all things pure and new. An awesome reminder of this came when we opened the items in our stockings this morning. Katherine received a pack of sight word flashcards which James opened to check out. The first card he pulled out had the word "make" on one side and "new" on the other. God is amazingly faithful, blessing us in too many ways to enumerate. I pray that you are filled with joy this holiday season and beyond!

Hi

Hi
How are you?
Just a couple of days ago we bought an  Apple MacBook Pro MC024LL/Afrom ! this website    www.Xmastrade.com
It is indeed a fantastic machine, though it will take some time to get used to the new system.  Wireles mouse and keyboard. Nice design.
and I love it. I paid $1260US all charges included   the chose to use the Core 2 Duo but that's not all bad. This is a stable, cool running, capable processor.   I use this mostly for work where stability, battery life, portability, and longevity are the most important things to me. I rarely play games. I especially like the backlit keyboard.   if you want to get one.you can check it out .
 
Kind regards,
Katrina Ogden Kanary

September in review...

Things have been busy in the Kanary nest this month. Obviously we welcomed Ella to the world on the 7th. We celebrated James' birthday on the 13th. Grandma and Grandpa Kanary came to visit for almost a week. James went back to work. Kat's mothers group re-started after taking the summer off. Uncle Lucas (or as Jack says it "undle ludas") stopped for the night with his bandmates on their way from one show to the next during the midwest leg of their tour. Now we are gearing up for Katherine's birthday and looking forward to Halloween!

Here are some pictures from the month:

Jack meets Ella Rose

Jack meets Ella Rose, originally uploaded by kokanary.

Katherine and Jack stayed with our wonderful neighbors the night we spent in the hospital and Jack hung out with them during the 2 days I was in labor and recovering.

When we came home it was almost 9pm, but they brought Jack home to meet his new baby sister and got to enjoy the introduction with us!

Katherine meets Ella Rose

VID00050, originally uploaded by kokanary.

We hadn't planned to bring Katherine or Jack to the hospital to meet Ella. We thought it would just be easier to have the introduction be on home turf in an environment we could more easily control. Things just worked out such that we asked to be discharged from the hospital early and that meant James picked Katherine up at school and the two of them came back to the hospital to pick Ella and I up to go home. So, we got Katherine on video meeting Ella in the hospital.

My favorite question from Katherine - how do you know it is a girl? Well, honey, the same way we know you are a girl, I guess... She asked the question several times - apparently it was important to know for sure!

I also love that she was excited about her new baby sister, but equally excited to see the hospital room and check things out! Before long all she really wanted was a snack...typical Katherine!

Fun surprise from friends!

Opening gifts from the Hren family, originally uploaded by kokanary.

When we got up from naps today there was a box on our front porch. While cooking dinner we opened the package to find presents! We were blessed to have the opportunity to show a friend's family around and hang out a bit when they came to help him move to KC a few weeks ago.

As if the blessing of their company wasn't enough, they sent the kids gifts - we are so blessed! Thank you so much Clem, Fran and Jessica. We would love to host you for dinner the next time you are in town!

We got a wii!!!

Well, not exactly, but Jack has dubbed our post-Christmas purchase the "wee." Grandma and Grandpa were generous enough to send some Christmas money to the kids. With that money we purchased a really cool slide! Here is a video of the kids playing on the "wee" this morning.

Meeting Santa

Meeting Santa, originally uploaded by kokanary.

Our realtors have become friends. We spent quite a while looking for a house in KC and they were amazing through the entire process. They are truly good at what they do and make their customers feel like family. Each year they host a breakfast with Santa and invite all of their customers.

We had a blast! Katherine got her face painted, both kids got balloon animals, they both sat on Santa's lap, and Katherine talked to him a little bit. It was a fun morning and we got some great pictures!